First dates are always special. There is this element of surprise; you get butterflies in your stomach just imagining how it would be. You can literally close your eyes and imagine a fairy-tale unfolding. Such is the innocent excitement and idealism of a first date.
As a transgender man, it’s a beautiful feeling when you ask out the girl of your dreams and she says yes. No wonder you are on cloud nine. But there is a lot more groundwork to be done yet! How you plan out your first date is what matters most. As the adage goes, first impressions are the last impressions. So, you should leave no stone unturned in making your first date unique and special.
If she has a good time during the first date, she would certainly want to go out on a second date with you. It’s as simple as that. But for that magic to happen, you have to invest some time, energy and creativity in planning out the date.
Below are some tips that would help you plan out an awesome first date for the girl who makes you go weak in the knees!
Be Creative in Planning Out the Date
This is most important. You can’t just take her out anywhere. A trans man taking out his crush on a date for the first time needs to invest some thinking into where he can take her. Everyone goes out on dates to fancy and expensive restaurants and cafes. There is nothing new about that. If you want to impress your girl, plan out something that is new, exciting and matches her hobbies.
If she is a dancing queen, get to know what kind of music she likes dancing to and take her someplace they are playing a live band along those lines. If your date is into books and reading, try to search for a café that also has a library or a bookshop attached to it. And take her out for a daytime date to that place. If you know for sure she is the clubbing rockstar, take her out to the best club in town. Or else maybe, she is too much of a nature lover. In that case, take her out to a garden café, a restaurant that has a terrace with a stunning outdoor view or take her out to a quaint, little pub in the mountains where the two of you can take a refreshing walk after the meal.
If you are creative in planning out your first date, she is going to love it. Women appreciate these little surprises. Your date would certainly notice that you put in so much effort in planning out that date and figuring out her likes and preferences. If you ask her out for a second date, she is probably going to say yes!
Be a Good Planner!
This is very important. Now that you have figured out where to take her, the next step is to plan out everything really well. We might have the best of ideas but unless we execute them, it’s no use. As a transgender man, you got to make sure that you’ve got everything figured out well in advance, the venue, how to get there, the amount of time it would take in getting from one place to another if you have 2,3 places on your itinerary.
When you finally go out on a date with that gorgeous woman you met through a transgender dating site, you don’t want to be embarrassing yourself with last-minute glitches. The whole thing should be effortless and smooth. Everything has to be so perfect that she completely forgets about the practical aspects of that date. And those practical things need to be taken care of by you.
Be a Gentleman When it Comes to Expenses
As a trans man, it is important that you bear the expenses of the first date yourself. On subsequent dates, the two of you could split the bills or work out a mutual arrangement, if the need be. But as a gentleman, you shouldn’t let your lady spend any money on the first date.
Even if she insists, just explain to her gently that you asked her out and therefore, you are going to take care of all her expenses. It’s not about money but it is certainly about gentlemanly behaviour and these little courtesies that women appreciate.
Money is not a big deal but if you take care of all her expenses on the first date, it shows that you value the lady.
Be at Your Best Behaviour
Good manners cannot be faked. But when you are with a lady you fancy, you obviously make an effort to be at your best behaviour. As a trans man going out on a first date with someone, you ought to remember that your prospective lady love would be closely observing your behaviour during the date.
Make an effort to pay attention to whatever she is saying. Be courteous and polite. Also, be a bit restrained when it comes to flirtation. While she won’t mind subtle and tasteful flirtation, anything over the top might make her feel you are too desperate or creepy. So, keep it cool and balanced.
Your body language plays an important role in how others perceive you. Be confident and relaxed. Avoid fidgeting too much. Also, look directly into the eyes of the lady when you are speaking. When you have the courage to look into someone’s eyes while you are talking, it shows your intentions are good and honest. On the contrary, if you cannot look directly into a person’s eyes, that gives the impression of a somewhat shady character. Just remember that in trans girl dating, it's these little perceptions that matter. Also, when it’s a date, it’s also romantic to look into the eyes of the woman of your dreams. Maybe, you two get a bit carried away and keep looking into one another’s eyes all evening.
Finally, good behaviour is not just about how you behave with her. It’s also about how you behave with others around you. The way you speak to the staff at your date venue tells a lot about your character. If you are arrogant and impolite with them, she would obviously judge you. So, keep that in mind.
The Good Old Candlelight Dinner Never Goes Out of Fashion!
Women are creatures of romance. They love a fairy-tale setting when it comes to spending time with someone special. There is something eternal and otherworldly about the idea of love so it is a somewhat fantastic, magical setting that can indeed do wonders for your first date.
If you cannot figure out anything else for your first date, take her out for a candlelight dinner! That’s one clichéd idea that always works. Dim lights, beautiful and laid-back music, some champagne, chocolates and flowers, this is the stuff of every girl’s dream. It is the deepest desire of every woman to be treated like a princess. A woman is capable of such dreamlike delicacy and love but first, she wants you to prove that you are worthy of it.
So, take her to a nice restaurant and surprise her with a candlelight dinner. Surprises are always good. Maybe, do not inform her in advance that it will be a candlelight dinner. She would be even more impressed if you pre-order a cake with her name on it or maybe a nice, little quote about how you like her. And then make your princess cut the cake, while the two of you are out on the candlelight dinner date. Your lady would absolutely love this. Also, make it a point to give her some gift when you meet her. It could be flowers, perfume, anything. The cost of the gift doesn’t matter. It doesn’t have to be expensive. It’s the feelings that are important.
Take Special Care of Her Safety
This is most important. You have to take special care of the safety of your woman during and after the date. If you are in a crowded place and some guy is making her, feel uncomfortable, you should be able to stand up for her. While she obviously doesn’t expect you to pick up a fight, she does expect you to tell off that guy politely but firmly.
Women these days are independent and capable of protecting themselves for sure. It is certainly not about patronizing her. But as a trans man, standing up for your woman shows that you care for her. A woman wants to be with someone who can take control of things when they get messy. Imagine being at a restaurant and your woman feeling uncomfortable due to something and you just sitting in a corner, watching quietly. What kind of impression it would create? She would probably never see you for a second date.
Taking care of your date’s safety also involves making sure she gets back home safely. We still live in a patriarchal society, unfortunately so women’s safety is a concern, especially during late night. If she is uncomfortable about the idea of you dropping her home, book her a cab but keep a tab of her journey. Talk to her over the phone till she gets back home safely.
You might impress a woman with flowers and chocolates and candlelight dinner but when she gets to know that you genuinely care about her wellbeing, that’s when her heart starts melting.