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So you’ve been active on a transgender dating site or ts dating app for a while and finally caught the eye of a trans woman. You chatted, truly enjoyed the back-and-forth, and feel a strong enough connection to take this to the next level.

Yet this is where things tend to get complicated. Online dating is already quite the challenge, but taking any relationship offline can prove daunting, no matter what gender you and your match identify as. The questions remain the same: When is the best time to suggest a real-life date, even at a safe distance if necessary? How can you be certain your potential partner feels the same? If you gathered the courage, how do you phrase your question?

Let’s assume that somehow, you did it. And congratulations, they said yes!

Now the real adventure starts. When you’re dating a transgender woman, you will face more – or rather, different – challenges on your romantic journey.

Your presence on trans dating sites indicates that you already know a bit about trans issues and the reality of transgender lives. However, if you are genuine in your interest when it comes to exploring dating a transgender woman, you will need to do your homework, as they say.

This homework includes research on several aspects of transgender life, including the harder parts and topics you, as a cis person (that is, a person who identifies with the gender they were assigned at birth), might not have on your radar yet. The lack of true and practical information, which may be difficult to come by online if you aren’t entrenched in the community, further complicates your progress.

Fortunately, you have found this guide and thus a great starting point! If you have been wondering what it would be like to date a trans woman or if you have started dating one and need a roadmap to help you navigate the dynamics, the following information will be very useful.

Research and Reflect

Before you begin your search for a trans woman on any transgender dating site or ts dating app, you should take a bit of time to research and understand the various aspects of the transgender community.

Topics we recommend you explore if only on the surface, include but are not limited to: 

– What does trans/transgender mean? How does it relate to the concepts of intersex or the term transvestite?

– What is the difference between sex and gender?

– What are common gender stereotypes and how does the trans community work to dismantle them? What are gender nonconforming practices?

– What legal and medical ramifications are involved in being trans? What role do hormones play? What surgery options are available, and how difficult is it to access them? Who opts for surgery and why, who decides against it?

You do not need to spend too long doing this research before you will have successfully dispelled several myths about transgender lives.

Having at least a basic understanding of these concepts and questions will lessen the burden your future partner or date will have to carry. Just like it is not on people of color to educate their white friends on the realities of racism and ‘Life While BIPOC’, do not expect trans people to enlighten you. Some might be willing to, but the onus is on you to learn.

While doing this research, you might want to reflect on your own experiences. How do you experience your gender? What shaped it? What stereotypes do you maybe harbor? How does this affect the way you approach dating?

Dating a trans woman may not fit your preconceived ideas of dating a cis woman. We assure you, however, that it will be worth the effort you invest in opening yourself up for new experiences.

Avoid Transgender Talk During Your Dates

While you might be curious about your date’s history or details about their life as a trans woman, never make the mistake of delving too deep into the subject of transgender. Just as curiosity killed the cat, it could also kill any relationship potential that was budding between you and a trans woman. It is possible that the subject might pop up later, but in the beginning, it is better to err on the side of caution and steer away from potentially awkward subjects. Remember that, for most people, their gender is an intimate subject, and talking about it with anyone requires trust and feeling secure in the situation.

Even if she initiates the subject at some point, we recommend proceeding carefully. Be careful of boundaries and intrusive questions. However, when she expresses willingness to talk about transgender topics and her own journey, listen keenly and without judgment. Show that you appreciate the trust she places in you and proves yourself worthy of this trust.

First Impression Matters

How you meet the trans woman on your first date may make or break any chances you have of a long-term romantic relationship. Since yes, first impressions matter. Beyond the way you communicate, this also holds true for attire and clothes.

While not every female-presenting person in the trans community values fashion and spends ample time on styling themselves, putting an effort into one’s appearance is a form of self-care. If we feel comfortable in our skin, we will looser and more relaxed when meeting a potential partner for the first time.

You should complement this by putting effort into your dress and maintenance. You do not need to dress up to the nines – but make choosing an outfit an active and conscious choice. Select something that reflects you and your character, don’t ‘dress up’ or pretend you are something you’re not. Natural charm goes a long way and shows your date that you are genuine in your interest.

Be a Gentleperson

Some transgender women enjoy presenting even more feminine than their cisgender counterparts. Other trans women may act more genderneutral or be actively nonconforming and/or fluid. Regardless of how they present, be a gentlemanly date. Not in a condescending way, but from a place of deep respect.

Whether you are a cis man or a cis woman and about to date a transgender lady, you can be courteous. Chivalry, in the sense of pulling out chairs or opening doors, might have a very positive effect on your date. However, only do this if it fits your personality and style. As with clothing, there is no need to pretend you are something you aren’t. Engage your date in meaningful conversation, truly listen when she talks, and smile so that she sees you enjoy her company.

Be Prepared to Talk Politics

For many people in the transgender community, politics is an important subject. The government decides who can transition from one gender to another, whether or not there are gender options outside the binary of male and female, how easy access to hormones or surgery is, and how protected we are in our everyday lives.

While ‘Keep away from politics’ may be sound dating advice for some, when it comes to being active on a ts dating site, you should be prepared to engage in political debates.

This advice ties in well with the research homework you have been given already. Unless they know someone personally, most cis people are unaware of the legal aspects and challenges of being transgender. If you educate yourself, you will certainly impress your date by showing interest and communicating that you are genuine in your pursuit of dating a transgender woman.

When It Comes To Sex

… be patient. Taking one’s time is a good idea regardless of gender identity, since building a long-lasting relationship depends on so much more than sex.

For some transgender women, sex can also be a difficult topic. Not every trans woman had top and bottom surgeries, so do not assume you know what your date’s body looks like underneath her clothes. Once you have built a foundation of trust and you both feel comfortable in each other’s presence, you may certainly ask your date about their sex life. Share your own experiences, if you think it might help. Showing your partner that you are open to talking about intimacy will go a long way in making her feel respected and safe.

Communication is key here – never assume anything. Many trans dating sites offer the option to specify operation status and more, yet this does not mean every person experiences this the same. The wonderful thing about human sexuality is how varied and colorful it is. Explore with curiosity and an open mind. Don’t set yourself any expectations to meet, or signal your transgender partner that there is a certain way they have to perform in order to earn your affection. 

After all, you are dating a transgender woman from a place of love, on a quest for belonging and connection. Neither one of you is in this for a quick hookup - there are other ts dating apps for that.

While there are certainly more tips that will help you navigate the trans dating experience, this hopefully proves a useful guide and starting point. Now off you go, be brave, and make a move!

You’ve been toying with the idea of dating a transsexual woman for quite some time now. And you’ve now joined a trans dating site through which you hope to meet the transsexual woman of your dreams. Well, so far so good. But what you need to realize is that you can’t expect dating a trans woman to be like dating someone from a different planet! If you think a trans woman is an exotic creature who is completely different from your average cis woman, you are totally wrong.

A transsexual woman is a woman like any other. So, when you approach her for dating, do not harbour any pre-conceived notions or popular cultural stereotypes about trans women. Just connect with her as you would with any other woman and let things flow organically. It really is as simple as that. But guys tend to make it overcomplicated when it comes to dating a transsexual woman.

So, before you start dating a trans woman you’ve met through a transsexual dating app or a transsexual dating site, you need to get some basic knowledge on what it means to be a transsexual woman. Here are a couple of points that you should keep in mind before dating a transsexual woman.

You Got to Understand What Transsexuality Is

Before you begin to date a transsexual woman through a transgender dating app or a transsexual dating site, you need to do some basic research on ‘Transsexuality’. Ignorance is certainly not bliss, especially in such a scenario. You are more prone to stereotyping people or giving them labels when you don’t have a clue about who they actually are. But once you have some kind of background, you can understand better and perhaps even empathize.

The first thing that you need to understand is that a transsexual woman is not some crazy creature who spent loads of money on medical transitioning just because she had a whim one fine day that she wants to be a woman. If you think like that, you are certainly downgrading the life struggle of transsexual people and negating their strong sense of identity.

A transsexual woman has undergone transitioning because the gender identity she belongs to in her heart happens to be different from the gender she was assigned at birth. So, it’s not a frivolous choice she is making. Being born with the wrong gender biologically has always been a source of intense trauma to her and that’s why her identity is a matter of life and death for her. Once you understand this, you’d be able to appreciate her and her life choices better.

Once you understand what transsexuality actually is, you’d be able to comprehend in totality all the struggles she has undergone and the pains she has taken to live like the woman she actually is. And when you begin dating her through a trans dating site or a trans dating app, you won’t be lost as to how you should move forward.

Dating a Transsexual Woman Does Not Make You Gay

Many cis guys are scared of dating transsexual woman thinking that they will be perceived as gay if they do that. Well, if societal perception is all you care about, don’t even bother to date her. You are certainly not up to her standards, in that case. But even for your own knowledge, you got to know that dating a trans woman doesn’t turn you gay by any stretch of the imagination.

A trans woman is a woman just like any other. When a cis guy is dating a trans woman, it’s almost like dating any other cis woman. The relationship follows the same course and patterns of courtship. There are similar rules to be followed when it comes to physical love and intimacy. So, you are dating her pretty much like you would any other woman within the normative framework of heterosexuality. The question about you being gay because you are dating a trans woman doesn’t even arise.

The question exists mostly in your mind because you are focussing too much on the word ‘trans’ and not thinking enough about her identity as a woman. Just focus on her identity as a woman and all your doubts would go away automatically.

Don’t be Obsessed with the Subject of Her Transition

You’ve been talking to her through a trans girl dating site or a trans woman dating site for quite a while now. You think it’s the right time to make the next move and ask her out for a date. She happily agrees. Now, when you meet her at a café, how do you begin the conversation? Suppose you are meeting a cis woman for a date, you would obviously start with some small talk about how the café is, how the ambience is and then move onto topics like her hobbies, interests, etc. But when you are meeting a trans woman in a café for your first date, how do you start the conversation? Do you get obsessed with the word ‘trans’ and straightaway start asking personal questions about her transition, her past life, what body parts she has? Just imagine the kind of shock she would get if you talk to her like that on your first date.

So, the point is whether it's a trans woman dating or cis woman dating, the rules are somewhat similar. You connect with your transsexual date at an individual level and not ask uncomfortable questions about her personal life. That kind of behaviour is rude, disrespectful plus it would make her feel as if you are just interested in having a good time with her physically. She would think that you don’t value her as a person.

So don’t get obsessed with the subject of her transition. If she has to tell you something about her past, she will when the right time comes. But don’t make your dates like some kind of journalistic interviews about her identity as a transsexual woman. That would make her feel uncomfortable and damage your relationship before it has even begun properly.

Be Gentle and Understanding

A transsexual woman has undergone a lot in her life. She has battled societal apathy, discrimination and outright hatred. It is possible that even her family abandoned her at such a crucial time in her life. Having endured so much, she has come out a thousand times stronger. But she is a human being, after all. There are moments when she breaks down and can’t handle it anymore. You got to comfort your transsexual woman with your gentle love and understanding during those moments.

She might sometimes have mood swings for no apparent reason. Do not judge her in those circumstances and label her a difficult woman. Just be gentle and considerate. Once you have managed to walk with her through all the thorny paths, you will meet the most beautiful, compassionate and loving woman on this planet. Just give her you're understanding and compassion and you will surely receive her love and trust.

Be Chivalrous

Chivalry never goes out of fashion. A transsexual woman is a confident woman with modern sensibilities. And yet, there is a certain old-world charm about her. Deep down in her heart, she desires a man who still has a bit of good old chivalry.

You don’t have to do anything major to catch her attention. It’s those little chivalries that matter; open the door for her, pull out that chair for her to sit, make an offer to carry her stuff if the two of you are walking and she is carrying a couple of shopping bags.

And once your relationship has reached that stage where you visit her house frequently, help her a bit with housework. Cook for her once in a while or just do the dishes and tidy up her apartment.

Your transsexual woman is fiercely independent. So, it’s not that she expects you to do anything for her. But these little acts of chivalry will make her feel that you genuinely care for her and can do anything to protect her from all harm.

Appreciate Her in a Wholesome Manner

When you’ve just started dating someone through a transsexual dating site and they happen to be gorgeous, it is obvious that you are besotted by her physical appearance. But as you get to know her better, do not restrict yourself to complimenting her only on her looks or appearance.

In fact, if you spend too much time commenting on her body, it might just backfire as your transsexual woman will think you are just interested in physical gratification. So go beyond the looks and all. Get to know her as a person and then compliment her on those other qualities. If she is amazingly well-read, praise her for that. Maybe she is someone who can hold forth a great conversation on any subject. Make it a point to compliment her on those great conversational skills. She is perhaps a great listener and gives the most accurate, well thought out advice on any given subject. Complement her on that quality of hers.

Don’t reduce your transsexual woman to a face and a body. She is an amazing personality in her own right. So, learn to appreciate her in a more wholesome way.

Transsexual women are mentally evolved creatures. Her respect and admiration for a guy would increase manifold when she sees that he is taking an interest in her mind and intellect. So, if you’ve just started dating someone through a trans girl dating site or a trans woman dating site, get to know her first. Try to strike an engaging conversation and then complement those unique personality traits of hers.

Dating a trans woman is not easy but it is one of the most exciting things you can do. Transgender dating became a lot more popular in the past years and you should definitely jump in this boat if you want to learn more about the rules of dating a trans woman and develop yourself. If you have an account on a trans dating website, such as the MTF dating site, you will have to get the courage to actually get together with your match.

Dating a trans woman will bring you new romantic experiences that you will never forget. It will help you rediscover new levels of passion and gain more confidence in yourself. Ultimately, such a relationship will bring you happiness and stability so you should give it a fair try. Jumping in the field of trans dating means that you are opened to learn new things about love and women. So that will enrich your experience but also your capacity of understanding your partner much better.

Rules of Dating a Trans Woman

Dating a transgender woman is one of the most intense experiences you can have in your love life. Trans people are very much in touch with their desirability and they are well aware of their worth. You will have to follow certain ethical rules when you are thinking to date and start a love relationship with such a complex woman. Here are some tips that will help you be successful in your relationship!

Being interested in a genuine way in your trans lady is always the key to your successful relationship. Try to discover them every time you talk or interact and appreciate who they really are.

Be Confident

You have to trust yourself that you are good enough in order to help your lover trust you. Know your qualities and don’t be shy in expressing them.

Remain Honest Under All Circumstances

You should always stay honest when you talk to a transgender woman. On the MTF dating site, honesty is one of the most important aspects. It is also what brings and keeps couples together.

These top rules of dating a trans woman will help you not only meet the right trans woman but also keep her in your life. And finally, dating a transgender woman will make you more aware of what you have to offer to your lover and what you expect from them. Go beyond your limits and find your lover today!